Tag: 2024

[1-STAR MOVIE REVIEW] Titanic 2

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JAAAAACK…. ROOOOOOSE… INEVITABLE HUBRIS OF HUMANITY FOR A CASH-IN SEEEEQUEL!

That’s right. The Titanic is setting sail again, and this time nothing could go wrong! We have technology and hindsight guaranteeing it will be — what? Global warming? Oh, sunuva…

So get below decks and join the Somethings as we journey around the Arctic Circle looking for fun and love in the craziest of places. We’re rich, relatable, and beyond reproach.. everything is gonna be great!

Now let’s light up this cigar and smoke it (something people obviously say all of the time) on 1-Star Movie Review: Titanic 2

Ok, here we go!

Full Episode

[BLOG] PCR ranks his top 5 Doritos flavors!

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Hey there Somethings!  PCR back on his blog ish (as the kids say)

Now, I’m not much into snacks anymore, but when I was, Doritos were my jam.  They’ve come a long way since I was a kid, and there are now a ton of flavors… some good.. some, well.. not so much.  Now, I haven’t tried them all, but from the ones I have, these are my top 5!

 

5 – Cool Ranch

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The first I remember that wasn’t “Doritos Flavored”.  It was different for it’s time, and it’s become ‘classic enough’ that it gets a spot on my list.

 

4 – Flamin’ Hot Limon

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not gonna lie, I love the combo of spicy and sweet/tart.  There’s enough heat here to make them spicy for sure, but not ‘hot for hot’s sake’.. there’s great flavor there too.

 

3 – Flamin’ Hot Cool Ranch

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

While original Cool Ranch managed to crack my Top 5, the Flamin’ Hot version is on another level.  Like Limon but without the tang, the FH versions have a flavor to go with their kick.

 

2 – Nacho Cheese

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The OG.  Still a go-to without a doubt.  When multiple bags are bought for a party or to stock up, there is at least one of these that comes along.

 

1 – Spicy Sweet Chili

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The top of the heap, the current champion… these are the best of the best.  Hot, sweet, spicy, tangy…  if they ever got rid of every other flavor and just called these “Doritos”, I would not at all be mad.

What about you Somethings?  What are YOUR top flavors?  Hit us on the socials and let us know!

-PCR

[ELEVATOR PITCH] Movie Prequel w/ Kevin Gootee

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Another week – another elevator – another big time CEO with a big check – it’s like we’re on a rotating schedule. If only we could go back before….

AND WE CAN! This week, we are pitching movie Prequels – stories before the story – and who is our guest CEO? It’s none other than Gutting The Sacred Cow host, stand-up, and friend of the Somethings, Kevin Gootee 

So hop into your podracer, fire up the Prometheus, or learn why Snakes? why did it have to be snakes, and maybe how they got on that mo’fo’in plane!

It’s time for Elevator Pitch: Prequels

Ok, here we pre-go!

Full Episode

[BLOG] Hatton On X-Men 97…

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If you weren’t aware, Marvel has dropped their new trailer for X-Men 97′ – a relaunch of the classic Fox Kids cartoon that introduced me to my favorite team of mutants. If you haven’t seen it, take a minute and go watch it, otherwise this makes no sense.

First, I have to give Diz credit – we are obviously moving to the next generation of Marvel Movies with Fantastic Four, Deadpool 3, and an inevitable trip to Graymalkin Lane (that’s where the X-Men live) – and they decided to start this journey with a retro Wolverine or two in Deadpool and a reminder of who the X-Men are at their core. It’s a bold move, Cotton, but it’s going to work. The brilliant thing they did though, is they have made the cartoon look as close to the old animation as they could. In a world of high def television with high refresh rates.. they went out of their way to make a show where you can count the frames. It’s an inspired choice to make old assholes like me feel like a kid again.

I could tell, just from the few shots, that they’re going to do a few specific stories. (At the very least, The Trial of Magneto) But – and this is what is going to make me run to the tv.. as they have proven with WHAT IF… there is a chance that this show is going to tie to the greater Marvel U somehow. Maybe it will have a multiverse clash with X-Men: Evolution. Maybe in the last episode the Time Agents will appear and shut the whole thing down. I don’t know – but for the first time in the last few years of Marvel, I am excited to find out.

Did you check out the trailer, sound off in all the places!

[THE BEGINNING] Dexter

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Not all shows are created equal. Some shows are brilliant and stay that way throughout. Others go out into the woods to become lumberjacks.

This week we are taking it to the dark passenger and his damp serial killer, Dexter Morgan. When it all began, was it good? Does it hold up? What did we notice this time that we never noticed before? Lastly, is it worth going back to?

So follow the Somethings down to Miami as we talk The Beginning: Dexter

Ok, here we go!

Full Episode

[BLOG] Hatton on Rampant Futurism…

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My favorite news headline of the last few years came out this past week:

Three million malware-infected smart toothbrushes used in Swiss DDoS attacks

Now, depending where you read, there have been some retractions as to whether this actually occurred, but all signs point to ‘yes, it did.’

How? I’ll keep it simple. An object given ‘smart’ capabilities by a company that doesn’t really do tech is likely to not make sure their smart object is future proofed. They aren’t network security experts… they make toothbrushes. The idea of having a toothbrush that bluetooth spreadsheet internet something er another sounds like a great selling point when your bestseller is a molded piece of plastic and some bristles. So, programmers from five years ago built a program on platforms from five years ago with the security knowledge of five years ago… but five years went by and some security hole was found. Do you think your smart toothbrush is getting new firmware?  Probably not.

And this headline is just the beginning. As we allow more and more pointless crap to connect to our wifi, we are adding more and more points of weakness to our home’s security. With a little knowhow it can be secured, but not everyone has a little knowhow.. all they know is they have a remote control ball they can bounce around their house from an app on their phone to fuck with their cat, or that their fridge texts them when the ice tray is frozen. They aren’t aware that their data can be piggybacked or a port can be left open or a password reset can be faked.

So please, look at this headline and laugh… because it’s truly f’n funny, but, please, for the love of dot, when your wifi smart toilet that posts a gif every time you shit using an AI algorithm so that the image relates to the consistency of your movement, just make sure you have a firewall configured.

What smart objects are taking over your household? Sound off in all the places.

Top Celebrity Roast Lines

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Comedy Central wasn’t the first people to do roasts.. the celebrity roast is a time honored tradition that goes back to a time when there were only four celebrities, so they each took turns making fun of each other.

Well, nowadays, everyone is a celebrity and we can make fun of them forever. So join the Somethings as we look back at some of the best single lines from roasts. From the roasters and toasters to the utterly burned – we’re talking our favorite Celebrity Roast Lines.

Ok, here we go, a family walks into a talent agency and says ‘Have I got an act for you…’

Full Episode

[BLOG] PCR talks about The Demise of Physical Media

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Hey Somethings, Podcast Rob here…
There’s been a disturbing trend as of late of physical media. Going away. From retailers no longer carrying DVDs, to the video game industry openly embracing cloud gaming and downloadable games, it seems like the days of physically owning your gaming and movie content are going by the wayside.  Personally, I’ve never been a quote” collector… Sure. I’ve owned DVDs, but never with the intent. Purpose of collecting them. As far as gaming goes, whenever I had my consoles, I never had more than two to three games per console… Mostly due to cost…. And now that I’m a PC gamer, all of my games are downloadable. Anyway, either steam or epic games or Xbox Game pass.
That said, it’s fairly disturbing to hear. Video game companies say that gamers are going to have to get used to buying games but not really owning them. When a company can just turn off access to a game that you’ve paid 50, 60, $70 or more for, that just sounds unconscionable.  I can understand paying a monthly fee to Netflix or Max or Paramount Plus and one month the streaming service says well. We’re no longer carrying this movie. But for a company to say this thing that you have explicitly bought access to you no longer have access to just seems like theft.

[5TH WHEEL] Dreamcasting: X-Men

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For the first time in 2024 we have a 5 week month – and we’re taking another thing we did and putting it here so we don’t do it that much because we do one of those things a lot more.  Make sense? You don’t care, it’s fine.

So we have The Wheel out of mothballs and that means we are spinning it to a topic which leads us to the wacky world of Marvel Mutants. The X-Movies are coming, so who could play the first class of DizMar Mutants?  Well we’ll lay out our teams and you can go to all of our social media and tell us which one is right.

So join me, my X-Men as we go to the 5th Wheel: Dreamcasting X-Men

Ok, here we BESERKER BARRAGE,

Full Episode

 

[BLOG] Hatton Talks Royal Rumble 2024

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Oh it’s Royal Rumble time – and I don’t wax poetic about wrestling a lot on here. Hell, I don’t even watch a lot of wrestling anymore. I do, though, keep up with the goings on of the men who fight in underwear for the right to wear a belt.

This weekend is the best event of the year – the Royal Rumble. 30 people go in the ring and at the end one person stands tall and goes to Wrestlemania to fight one of the champs. So let’s break down the expectations vs. who I want.

The Men’s Rumble

FAVORITES: The favorites of the Rumble are CM Punk and Cody Rhodes, two men who, not long ago, were in a different company. I give WWE all the credit in the world for accepting that these two guys have remade their names elsewhere and – as any big monolith does – swept in with big money to use them before their heat is down.

Cody – The problem I have with Cody winning is that I honestly just don’t like him. I think he comes across as smug and ‘I know I’m amazing’ and it bugs me.
Punk – My problem with Punk is that I loathe big name people coming in and sweeping the spots away from the performers that have been sweating in that ring for the last few years. How long has Chad Gable been in WWE? Damien Priest? Finn Balor? They get to constantly wait in a line that never gets any shorter as old guard shows back up.

WHO I WANT: There is one man that has been the VIP of wrestling for the last couple of years. His presentation, his style, his intensity, and even his promo work. That man is Gunther. He has earned his spot at the top of the pile.. and you can say ‘His time is coming’ – I say, no. His time should be now.

The Women’s Rumble

FAVORITES: There is a lot of wiggle room for some surprise in the Women’s Rumble, as there are mainstay favorites and very little chance that someone is going to come out of nowhere. The Bellas are gone and Charlotte is injured. There is one name that could swoop in..

Jade Cargill – She’s been waiting in the wings for her moment to shine, and there is every chance in the world she will be the surprise #30 to introduce her to the WWE world. I don’t want her for the exact same reasons I don’t want Punk. She just got there…
Becky Lynch – I love Becky, but she has won it already. She can make her way to Wrestlemania and pick her opponent without a problem. There is a bigger set of fireworks for her at the end, but the fact is she is going to be in the title picture no matter what, so why not tell a different story.

WHO I WANT: Fact is, the person I want is in the top considerations. Bayley. She has dealt through injury, the Rhonda years, and has simply been the workhorse of the women’s division. In one swoop you can give one of the Four Horsewomen their flowers, turn her face again, and say thank you to a woman who loves wrestling more than most.

So that’s it. Who’s your pick? Let us know in all the places.