Sure, Raimi did shakycam first… but did he give an actor a camera and tell them to just act like a dickweed for a few days and then scare the bajeezus out of him? No, that is Blair Witch territory – a movie franchise you either love or hate.
Maybe you love it because you fell for the gimmick of a movie that might have been real. Maybe you loathe the handicam films that it spawned. Perhaps, you love the whole mythos of the Burkittsville, MD creepy cryptid and need to know everything…
No matter what your stance is, they did a movie in 2016 that you didn’t see – and we’re going to review it. Is it as original as the first one? Does it answer the questions we threw into the damned river? Does it blow snotbubbles and apologize? Find out on Something In Review!
Ok, here we go.. standing in the corner…
Who out there can say they are a documentarian, comic book writer, and vampire hip-hop mogul?
Only one guy we know, and if you are a fan of Vampire: The Masquerade or Geek & Sundry, you know him too – it’s B. Dave Walters!
With LA By Night finishing up with its fifth season, and this, the Something Spooktacular month, there is no better time to join in to see who lives, dies.. or dies again, rather..
We talk Vampire, his work on the Dungeons & Dragons comic ‘A Darkened Wish‘, his documentary ‘Dear America, from a Black Guy‘ and his upcoming work ‘ElectroPunk‘ – and if you want to keep track of everything B. Dave Walters does, the best place to find him is on Twitter: @bdavewalters
So grab some 10-sided die and spend some blood points, ok, here we go!
I’m so proud of the world… it finally discovered one of my favorite sub-niche’s of entertainment: Games of Death
Everyone has gone crazy recently, the meme machine is pumping out hits, for Netflix’s newest gift from across the ocean, Squid Game.
Now, this premise may have some similarities to other things you’ve seen: A group of people are in a game that when they lose.. they die. Of course the similarities are there to be drawn to a dozen other things: Battle Royale, Hunger Games, Roller Games, Running Man, Gladiator, Alice in Bordertown, Saw… it’s a pretty lengthy list of weird movies that I have an affinity for.
In the month since it’s come out, it has already done the life and death of an internet trend. Some people notice it. Some people meme it. Some people declare it is the best thing that has ever been created and that nothing has ever been as unique. Some people hate those people. Some people get sick of it being mentioned and promptly hate it without ever having seen it. And they are the usual round of reactions.
Is it good, yes, but that’s not what I wanted to talk about here. It’s about how cool I am. You see, it’s a weird thing when something you’ve loved since you were a kid hits the zeitgeist. I get why the hipster mindset of ‘I was there before it was cool’ comes out because it feels like something special that you’ve owned for so long and now it isn’t part of your personal entertainment genetic code. There is this gut reaction of, ‘Yes, I know you like Squid Game, but have you ever seen…’ that makes you sound like a complete tool. I mean, they like Squid Game, sure, but don’t they understand that the trope of the character that can’t be good at the game or the bully are simply common features of the genre? Geez people, come on!
If you look inside yourself, you know you’ve done the same thing. Maybe it was when everybody started loving comic book movies and you stared at your longbox full of X-Force #1 and wrote a lengthy angry Livejournal post? Or when everyone got into Sharknado and you, the foremost authority on horrible ‘animals in disaster’ movies felt horrible when nobody called you for an interview.
Here’s the thing you need to hear though: don’t be that person. It’s great to discuss the origins of a genre or note all of these other movies that people who enjoyed Squid Game may have liked, but guess what… you don’t own a niche or a sub-genre. Yes, it’s frustrating that more people are ignorant to the nuance of people being flayed alive by board games, but you get to be the ambassador. Tell them how fantastic Tag is or find interesting comparisons to make about the characters. Use your obsession for the power of good.. and be happy the popularity of Squid Game means you may get a lot more games of death to watch in the future.
So how better than to bring in the Autumnal Season of Horror than with two of our favorite people out in the internet’o’verse?
This week, the Somethings are talking about a very particular topic. Some horror movies are good.. some horror movies are bad.. but, what SECOND horror movies are worth giving a shot? Of course anyone can talk about Texas Chainsaw X: Leatherspace or Leprechaun: Bring It On, but when you are only limited to the sophmore outing of your horror series, what’s out there that triumphs?
Joining us are none other than the Silver Screams (@Silver_Screams) – Megan Salinas (@themenguin) and Katie Cullen (@kiaxet) – two internet savvy fear fatales that you can find anywhere fans are talking about the things they love.
So get yourself some Pun’kin Spice, and ok, here we BOO!
If there is one thing that the Somethings don’t do.. it’s pitying fools. We don’t pity the fools, and we have, and will always have a ‘no fool pitying’ rule.
That said, we have somehow stumbled into this pit of fools, specifically the finale of the classic action adventure show, The A-Team.
So settle in as we look back to the finale of this beloved cult classic and ask whether it was worth the journey to get to this moment? From helicopters to Italian food names. From anchovies to exploding cars – did the A-Team go out with a bang, or more of a disgruntled Mr. T grunt.
There’s only one way to find out… join us for THE END: A-TEAM
Ok, here we go!
Can we discuss Wonka?
Those that know me know that there are a handful of movies that are ‘my thing’ – movies that, back in the day of VHS tapes and stegosaurii, my copies wore through. The original Wonka, Gene Wilder, 70’s perm and all, is probably the first film I can even think of that I wouldn’t stop watching as a kid. Since then, I’ve learned I wasn’t the only one and Wonka fits similarly into many people my age because of our exposure to it at the dawn of cable and the tape.
We are now getting not one, but two Wonka related movies and I am filled with the fury of a middle aged white man on the internet. So lets take a look at the rumors as to what we’re getting in the Wonderful World of Wonka and gauge how angry I’m going to be… to be clear, Depp Wonka gets me a 9 out of 10 on the Hate’Ometer, saved from a 10 solely by the CGI squirrels.
The first is a ‘young Wonka’ story, as portrayed by acting Wunderkind Timothee Chamalet (to be clear, I have no idea if he’s a wunderkind (or how to spell that)) I just know that he’s in a lot of places, and I don’t know anything about him. That said, this is rumored to be the first in a ‘Wonka Cinematic Universe’ which is a phrase that makes me wince so hard I felt my neck pop. The only saving grace to this entire concept is that the writer connected to it is Simon Farnaby who has done some notable work (including Rogue One, The Mighty Boosh) — but as the Depp Wonka taught us, sometimes, telling us too much ruins everything.
The second one is an animated series being created by Netflix and helmed by Taika Waititi of What We Do In Shadows and Ragnarok fame. This, mind you, I have less of a problem with as I have always wondered why there wasn’t a traditional Saturday Morning Cartoon about Wonka. There were cartoons for Back to the Future, Pac-Man, Robocop.. all that came well after the property had seen its golden days, so why not Wonka? A cartoon also feels quite less important in the scheme of the universe and a lot more ability to be playful without living in a green screen.
In the defense of both of these concepts, I do appreciate that they are being done by not-Americans. Waititi from New Zealand and Farnaby from England, Dahl’s humor and sensibility was most certainly not an American one and we’ve already proven we don’t deserve the rights to write a Wonka film… in the end, a cartoon gets only mild grunt from me, but a Cinematic Universe? Please don’t. Oh dot, please oh please do not. No good can come of it and what other books are you going to tie that into?! Maybe a discussion for another blog.
Unless, mind you, these Wonka properties help bring back Wonka candy bars… the ones that had the graham crackers in the blend… then you’ll get a pass as I sit on my couch with a mouth smeared in chocolate that a Gloop would be proud of.
thunder… Thunder… THUNDERCATS…
If, like me, your brain is now screaming ‘Hoooo!’ – you were likely of an era of a particular vintage of cartoons. WYou are left with questions … is Cheetara naked? Do Thundercats mate with their relatives or do they just ignore that cat thing?
And most important question of all…. If there was a Thundercats Movie, who should star in it?
So, this week on THE WHEEL, we are going to throw out our own ideas as to what the perfect Thundercats movie is – and we are not doing it alone. Joining us once again are the greatest Kevins in all the land – Kevin Gootee & Kevin Israel – also known as Gutting The Sacred Cow, a brilliant podcast where you can hear some of your favorite things torn to shreds. We would like to thank them for taking this trip to Thundera with us and giving us insight beyond insight.
Ready? Well, ok here we snarf snarf….
Hey all, PCR here!
So, I just watched the finale of LEGO Masters Season 2 last night and…I have thoughts.
First, let’s go over the teams…
Caleb and Jacob – Even though they had been in the bottom two more than any other team in the finale, they made their move towards the end, winning Episodes 9 (Land and Sea with their “Chameleobster”) and 11 (Cliffhanger) which gave them some great momentum going in to the final.
Mark & Steven – They held The Golden Brick the longest, and had the most wins going in to the final episode, and though they were only at risk of elimination twice, once was the episode right before the finale, which put them on shaky ground.
Zack and Wayne – They were only ever at risk of elimination once in Episode 10 (Flip My Block) and had more 2nd place finishes than any other team the entire season.
So, we’re in the finale, and the teams are tasked with doing a “Day/Night” build. Caleb and Jacob opt for an hourglass design with a ‘Day City’ on the bottom and a ‘Night Realm’ in the top of the hourglass. It was bold in design and impressive in construction considering the two halves were built separately and then the top literally flipped upside down to join with the base. Considering the middle didn’t actually connect and it was only the 4 outer pillars supporting the weight, it was amazing to me that the thing stayed together.
Mark and Steven opted for a “Warden of the Woods” character. The “Day/Night” shift was accomplished with a number of lights throughout the model, and while the water base they created was very impressive at “night”, the figure overall honestly wasn’t that impressive to me due to the complete brown build with little variations of color except the leaves for the hair and the glowing eyes.
Zack and Wayne went back to the well once more (which they did often this season) and incorporated dragons into their tower build. It was tall, and each floor of the tower was personalized to their story, but the “Night” shift felt like it was just lights inside each floor that made them brighter.
Overall, I was expecting something different when the Brickmasters said they wanted a build that had a different feel and look in each Day and Night segment. To my dismay, Caleb and Jacob came in third, leaving Zack and Wayne and Mark and Steven to fight for the top two and… to be fair… both builds left me nonplussed. Mark and Steven as a team just felt too… cocky? Too… entitled? I don’t know… just something about their demeanor and how they came off most of the season made me not a fan, and while Zack and Wayne had many of those same qualities, it was their constant use of things we had seen them do before that left me unimpressed with a lot of their builds.
For me, the REAL winners this season were Natalie and Michelle, and Dave and Richard. Both teams had that creativity factor in a lot of their builds that felt others were lacking. They thought outside the box (and the brick) to do builds that were always on theme, but always original.
I won’t spoil who the winner was.
Did the best team win? Probably. Did the most creative team win? Certainly not in my opinion.
Season 2, while I was happy to see it come back, didn’t live up to Season 1 (the highest rated episode of S2 was barely over half of the lowest rated episode of S1), and it will be interesting to see what, if anything, comes to fruition for a Season 3.
It’s time to head down to Vegas, get 10 of your best men, knock off three of Terry Benedict’s cas— no wait, that’s not right.
We’re going on a Vegas Vacation, and I have a briefcase full of reds, blues, moscat– no, still not right.
Oh, wait – it’s a zombie apocalypse and sin city is about to be nuked, so let’s get the most divisive movie maker in Hollywood right now and have him tell the story of people getting in and out before the big boom booms.
We’re not going on this journey of the dead alone – we’re bringing Dan from Netflix & Swill (Twitter:@netflixnswill) along with us. So sattle up, roll some 7’s, and let luck be a BRAAAAAAINNZZZ tonight.
Ok, here we go!
NOTE – Thank you to all of you that reached out due to our first post for this file had a sound error. This one should be better.
Well, it’s been a big rasslin week around the watering hole, which is perfect timing for us, because the Somethings are going back to the ring.. that’s right, we’re All Elite… we’re World Wide… we’re UWA Elite (where you can hear Hatton call the action!) We’re Total Nonstop. We’re… Ring Honoring and we’re Shimmering our way through a DOUBLE WIDE episode of the SomethingSomethingcast.
Joining us to discuss our favorite and least favorite finishing holds is friend of the show, host of the One Piece show the Yayo Talkshow – as well as a contributor to wrestling and nerddom all across the internet, you may have seen him most recently as the reporter in Buddy Matthews mysterious videos after leaving WWE – it’s Mark B Donica! (Twitter, Insta, Twitch)
The Pedigree of this episode has an X-Factor that is simply going to Stun you to Rock Bottom…… Spinarooni
Ok, here we gooOOH MY GOD HE’S BROKEN IN HALF!